...not for Bear's and my relationship....
After reading the discussion on FetLife's M/s board, I had a moment of total mental clarity about the M/s dynamic that we choose to live. I don't know if I could hack living as equals. I am not his equivalent. There are some parts of my life where I excel over him (stockmanship, cooking, cleaning) and some where He kicks my ass (strength, farming knowledge, driving in city) but on opinions and final calls...there is only one final answer.
His.
It's not to say that I don't have an opinion...hell, I am, at times, an opinionated bitch. He does listen to my opinion but we have found that there's no way in hell that being equals works. Someone has to knock my bullheaded stubborness down a notch or two to get a solution that works for the greater final good of the relationship.
I hate where people tell me stand up for your rights. What the hell is this, a bad rendition of a Bob Marley song or a Union Contract Negotiation? As long as Bear still allows me food, water and a place to sleep, all of my basic rights have been met. All others are conditional. This is not to say that He's some barbaric Neanderthal who bars me to the house. I still am allowed my friends and family and some alone time, because He feels that it makes me more human and thus better able to serve Him.
On major life decisions about careers, our son and the journey into being a Poly family, I do the research, report back to Him (hey there's another good reason I am working for Kochenower, the honing of my research skills), offer my opinion respectfully(not coming off like a power crazed bitch..did that once, never doing that again) and then wait for His final call...
There's rationale behind every reason...not just whim...
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